{"id":68,"date":"2002-01-30T15:40:00","date_gmt":"2002-01-30T14:40:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/2002\/1\/open_mic.html"},"modified":"2002-01-30T15:40:00","modified_gmt":"2002-01-30T14:40:00","slug":"open_mic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/2002\/01\/30\/open_mic\/","title":{"rendered":"open mic"},"content":{"rendered":"

For those of you who missed it, Phineas<\/a>, Molly<\/a>, Stephen<\/a> and I had a bangup time seeing Coz do the open mic thing at Vaughan’s Pub<\/a> last night. Lots of people play lots of 80s tunes<\/a> that we just happen to know all the words to. It’s kind of like the Brew & View<\/a> with music instead. Although I must say I don’t know whether to be proud or ashamed of the fact that I and all my friends know the lyrics to songs by the J.Geils Band.<\/p>\n

Anyway. As if the musical festivities weren’t enough, someone at some point said something that we all agreed should have been a haiku. Which, as you might imagine, led to some trouble. Here are some of my favorites, freshly transposed from the original cocktail napkins just for you:<\/p>\n

should be a haiku<\/p>\n

drives too fast and talks too much<\/p>\n

but it’s really not.<\/i><\/p>\n

[Molly<\/a>]<\/p>\n

…and then there was the mullet phase…<\/p>\n

matching mullets and <\/p>\n

auto parts jackets prove our<\/p>\n

love is eternal<\/i><\/p>\n

[Phineas<\/a>]<\/p>\n

in the corner store<\/p>\n

rare breed, mexican mullet<\/p>\n

it will race for you<\/i><\/p>\n

[me<\/a>]<\/p>\n

…followed by the inevitable economic debate…<\/p>\n

louisa buys beer<\/p>\n

phineas buys beer as well<\/p>\n

molly buys no beer<\/i><\/p>\n

[Molly<\/a>]<\/p>\n

irresponsible<\/p>\n

shoes and drinks and eating out<\/p>\n

molly buys no beer<\/i><\/p>\n

[ibid<\/a>]<\/p>\n

poverty haiku<\/p>\n

internet has claimed one more<\/p>\n

someone must be blamed<\/i><\/p>\n

[me<\/a>]<\/p>\n

…did I mention the bass player?<\/p>\n

i play my bass now<\/p>\n

all with the shaking of ass<\/p>\n

what, you don’t like me?<\/i><\/p>\n

[Stephen<\/a>]<\/p>\n

i play bass real good<\/p>\n

least that’s what my friends all say<\/p>\n

you should worship me<\/i><\/p>\n

[me<\/a>]<\/p>\n

i play bass real good<\/p>\n

my friends told me, “start a band!<\/p>\n

just please do not sing.”<\/i><\/p>\n

[Molly<\/a>]<\/p>\n

… and then it got late.<\/p>\n

too late for haiku<\/p>\n

not too late for one more beer<\/p>\n

silly people, sing!<\/i><\/p>\n

[me<\/a>]<\/p>\n

beer stains on napkins <\/p>\n

too late nights with too much<\/p>\n

sleepy happy kids<\/i><\/p>\n

[Molly<\/a>]<\/p>\n

the moral of the story:<\/p>\n

write some bad haiku<\/p>\n

when you’re sober, they’re stupid<\/p>\n

fuck it, we were drunk.<\/i><\/p>\n

[me<\/a>]<\/p>\n

Thank you. Thankyouverymuch. And a good day to you all.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

For those of you who missed it, Phineas, Molly, Stephen and I had a bangup time seeing Coz do the…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-68","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorised"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=68"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/68\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=68"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=68"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/custom-deluxe.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=68"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}